Since yesterday I've been in a funk about this FISA mess. The Democratic leadership, all of them, have basically capitulated to Bush's demands for telecom immunity and warrantless wiretapping capabilities. The biggest blow was when Senator Barack Obama actually supported the measure, albeit with reservations.
But instead of groveling and whining, let's look at the upside. Today, Republicans have invested the executive branch with near-dictatorial powers, free of oversight or impediment. 4th Amendment? Forget about it! And in just seven months time (fingers crossed) those powers will be bestowed upon President Obama.
So let's look at the upside folks, and start asking: Who should President Obama wiretap?
And don't worry, the Republicans won't complain about it. After all, they forced this horrible bill upon us! They begged for it, they stamped their feet, they put up counters telling us how long it's been since warrantless wiretapping was legal, they wrote op-eds and blog posts galore calling for this bill. So when Obama wields these powers, they will have no one to blame but themselves.
Obviously, we'll start by wiretapping the terrorists. That's a given.
But with a War on Terror going on, there are plenty more folks who might be impeding our victory. You know, folks who advocate reckless foreign wars that damage America's image, people who choose not to send troops into Tora Bora to catch Osama bin Laden, people who sew dissent at home using smear attacks against fellow Americans, people who try to bankrupt our economy by pushing huge tax cuts during wartime.
In other words, I think President Obama should wiretap every Republican politician in America. Along with ex-politicians like President Bush, Dick Cheney, guys like that. And former Bush administration officials like Karl Rove, Alberto Gonzales, Donald Rumsfeld, John Yoo, Harriet Miers, Paul Wolfowitz, Ari Fleischer.
And let's add right wing bloggers to the list. Who knows what anti-American hatred they are privately brewing? For all we know, there might another Timothy McVeigh out there -- and we can't take a chance. Let's wiretap every right wing radio host, starting with Rush Limbaugh and Michael Savage, then move on to all those Fox News pundits. What is Sean Hannity really hatching up, and will he continue to hurt America?
After all, these corrupt crooks have weakened America in the fight against terror. While the FISA court might not think the evidence is strong enough to tap their phones and read their emails, thanks to today's bill we don't have to worry about pesky courts or warrants or any of that stuff. President Obama can just appoint Hillary Clinton as the head of the National Security Agency, and she can exact revenge on the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy by, well, listening to everything they say.
It's not unconstitutional anymore. It's not wrong. In fact, as the Washington Post and the Wall Street Journal tell us today, it's the right thing to do. Bush, Cheney, Mitch McConnell, and John McCain wouldn't support this bill if it could be abused, right? I mean, they do know that a Democratic president could inherit these vast new spying powers, right?
So today's cloud has a silver lining. Come January, Big Brother will have many new persons of interest to monitor. I think I'm starting to like this bill after all.